And I'm sure there will be more to say later.

Ok, I just have to say this one little thing. I’ve been at my present job for almost 3 years now, and there have been many many many occasions where I just wanted to walk the fuck out of here, but I didn’t because I figured I had it good here. I have good hours, decent pay and a pretty flexible boss, sounds good right? Well, here lately, I’ve been putting out my resume everywhere, and have had to date 4 different offers, and Thursday is my last day here. In the past few interviews I’ve had I pretty well went along with what they told me they paid and what they told me the hours would be, but in the past 2 days I’ve learned something. If someone responds to your resume, it means that they have an opening somewhere and that they were really impressed with your resume, and that they want you to come work for them. So, the past two interviews I’ve had have been over the phone and when they say well we pay 8 an hour, I’d say well I really can’t leave my current pay of 10.50 for 8 ya know and they’ll be like oh well, we could possibly give you 10, would that be ok. Then they’ll say well we’d need you for some nighttime work, and I say I’m available for a night or two a week but I can’t have mainly nighttime hours because I have a young daughter, and then they’ll say something like well I think we can work around that. I never realized that if you counter offer them, they usually will go along with it. I’m getting pretty good at this whole interview process thing.

I had a message yesterday from the Humane Society, and I don’t remember putting my resume in at the Humane Society but when I called her today she said another clinic I faxed it to fowarded it to her and she was impressed by it. She asked me if I was flexible for nights and weekends and I told her I really couldn’t work much past 6 or 7 at night and she said that in that case, she’d try and get me a position at the actual Humane Society because they close at 7 on certain nights, then she asked me what kind of pay I expected and then told me that they start full time at 8.50 and I told her I make 10.50 now so she said well I guess we can do 9.25 if that would be alright. So it really pays to open your mouth I guess.

It kinda blows my mind that I’ve stayed here for so long with the impression that I just couldn’t get it any better somewhere else, when that’s so not true. Obviously people like my employment record, and are impressed with my skills, obviously companies want me or I wouldn’t have gotten 8 hits now off of the resume that I’ve only sent to 12 places. 8 out of 12 is really good odds to me. I just can’t believe that I’ve wasted my time here like I have, this job is shit. I’ve been fighting with Dan for months just to get a .50 cent raise, and he’s just been dicking me around like he always does. It’s bullshit. The women here always say they stay because of the freedoms you have at this job, but that’s not really that much of a bonus to me. I’d much rather actually enjoy my work, and my time at work then to be able to go to friggin Wal-mart every day. I still get an hour lunch here, and 2 breaks if I choose to take them. Almost any place you work understands if you have to call in because your child is sick, that’s not unusual. This place just isn’t as great as they like to make it seem. I’m really not sure what kind of a hold ths place has on people, but it must be a strong one because it’s had it’s grubby little claws in me for 3 years now. I’ve finally broke through it though and am moving on to bigger and better things.

I’m sure the very first day I’m gone everyone here is gonna be like Well I never liked this about Robyn and she never did this right and I just hated how she did this, well bitch all you want bitches because theres a few things that Robyns never likes about you guys either. Not that I hate anyone I work with there or anything, but they all have their little quirks. For instance…. Pay…… now everyone there seems to think it is wrong of me to bitch like I do about my pay because “all the other receptionists made less than you do” well that might be true, but I can only chalk that up to one reason…. All the other receptionists were retarded. I, however, am not retarded, most the time. None of the other receptionists filled out those stupid questionairres that I fill out maybe 20 a day of, none of the other receptionists took on complexes for bookeeping, whereas I have 5, none of the other receptionists stayed around for as long as I have, none of the toher receptionists did as much as I do so fuck your “all the other receptionists made less than you do” fuck it right in it’s pimply a-hole. EVERYONE that works in the office makes more than I do, EVERYONE…. Even precious little Tina makes more than me and she came on a year after idid. How do I know what everyone makes? Because me and brandi are nosy little assholes and have peeked into the peachtree programs and at peoples checks when we’d pass them out. There was a time when brandi was obsessed with finding out what Tina made because we both believe that Tina was hired on making more than even Brandi makes and Brandi’s been there like 6 years or so.

I’d have stayed here if Dan would have just given me a raise, that’s all I asked for, been asking for it for a month or better now and it just aggravates me that it just won’t happen around here. It’s amazing though at the things people will tell you when they find out your leaving. Like Shirley telling me that Dan said all these wonderful things about how good of a job I did for him, and how much of a bind they’ll be in once I’m gone and how much he appreciates me… he said all this YESTERDAY…. Would have been WONDERFUL to hear a fucking year ago DICK. But everyone, and by everyone, I mean the maintenance men, have all been talking to me about how they totally understand where I’m coming from and how shitty it is to work here sometimes and how cheap dan is…… ugh it’s just kinda aggravating. Anyway, I’m leaving now, Thursday is my last day and I can’t fucking wait. I’ve ben counting down the days and I thank god for finally opening up my eyes and for giving me the opportunity to leave this happiness sucking problem causing overdramanating always bitching whine whine whine shithole of a place.

AMEN.

Moving, and babies, and friends... Oh my!

Ok, we’ve decided to move now. Hehe, it’s always something with us huh? The two job offers I got weren’t that thrilling to me, either way I go I’m gonna hate the schedule they give me so me and Sean decided that if I decide to take one of them, it’s gong to be for as short of a period as possible. I say "if" because I’m also trying some temp agencies to see if they can give me anything for a month or so.
We’ve decided to move at the end of November to Mt. Sterling. Sean already pretty much has a job up there, and I shouldn’t have too much trouble finding something. I’ve already worked it out with Shannon that we are gonna stay with her for a little while just until we get established. I’m really excited about it, we’ve been wanting to move to the country for a long long time now, I just hope Mik adjusts and everything alright. She’s still young though and I’m sure she’d adjust at this point to pretty much anything we did as long as she knew she still has us you know. I know she’ll miss her daycare, but she’ll make friends in her new daycare up there, and she’s already got friends outside of daycare down there, as do we. My grandma made the comment that I’m the only grandkid of hers that has always been there for her and she’s afraid that if I move away, me and her won’t be as close as we are now. Well, I see my grandma maybe once or twice a month and I live in the same city as her, so I think that we’ll just have to make it a point to make sure we come to visit about every other month or so. That way Mik gets to see her still and I get to spend time with her still.My grandma may have just recently had a mild stroke, and she knows it but she didn’t go to the doctor so I think that she’s thinking that she wont be around forever and doesn’t want to lose the closeness that her and I have always had, so I’m going to do everything in my power to see to it that she never feels lonely without me. Mikayla is also the only one of her grandkids that she sees on a regular basis, but with us moving by my cousin who is also having a baby, we can make sure now that BOTH the kiddos get to have a great relationship with their great grandma.
Speaking of Shannon, she called me at work today and said that she went into labor last night. She noticed some bleeding so she went to the hospital, and by this morning she was starting to thin out and she dialated to 1 cm. They have pretty much stopped the labor but she’s still thinning so it’s only a matter of time really before she has her baby. The doctors are giving her steroids and everything to strenghthen the baby’s lungs in hopes that everything will be developed enough for little Danika to be alright if she is born this early.She’s still got about 8 weeks left before she’s full term, so everyone pray for Shannon, Adam, and little Dani tonight that the labor stops and she holds off for at least another 3 or 4 weeks, everything should be all good by then.
It is kind of a tough decision to move, and kind of an easy decision to move. I’m going to miss all my friends just stopping by at night like they do, and I’m going to miss just getting together on a whim like we do, but at the same time, I think this move is better for Mikayla. Everyone we know down there has kids, and Mik’s met all of them, so she already has friends down there. And in my eyes, it’s more important for her to make friends and have interaction outside of daycare then it is for me to have someone to hangout with. I’m an adult, I can maintain my friendships with no problems, and need to think about Mikayla. I’m worried that my friends won’t want to come visit us as much as we’ll visit them because they are all not country folk but I’m hoping that they will come visit us despite that fact. I’m really going to miss Seans brother Billy, but on that note, he’s going to join the Marines in May anyway so we’ll stop seeing him soon regardless, and I know that our house will be his house when he gets leave or whatever so I know we’ll see him. I guess I just need reassurance that us moving isn’t going to change the friendships that we have with everyone. Amanda, mark, Josh, Deena, and Candace are my world. I couldn’t survivie without them, and I know they feel the same about me, and I might be just a tad bit jealous thinking that Deena is going to replace me as mandas best friend, BUT, this isn’t the first time I’ve moved out of town and me and manda maintained exactly what we’ve always had, we just did it on paper instead. That was Arkansas though, this is still Kentucky. Ark. Was 8 hours away, Mt. Sterling is 1.5 );

My plan actually, is to visit as much as possible of course, but I want to set it up to where we come in every 6 weeks or so definite, if not for anythingelse other than to visit grandma and mom until mom moves with us. I love my friends more than most anything, and I pray that this works out like it is in my head.

I wish I could be as special as Tina......... bitch!

Can you all tell me the difference here? I wore a shirt to work once that said “Don’t be jealous” and Ben jumped all over me because it was too casual. Well, today Tina wears one of those happy bunny shirts ya know but it says “isn’t it cute how you think I’m listening?” and no one said a word. Now what’s the fucking difference there? If anything I think hers is worse than mine , if she has to talk to an owner or something and she hason a shirt that implys shes not listening to them…. Ugh… oh well fuck it two more weeks, two more weeks… hehe I told brandi though, I already know what shirt Robyn is wearing next Friday…. What are they gonna do…. Fire me? Lololol I’m an asshole, it’s great.

Decisions, Decisions

Ok, I was afraid to post anything on here about my interviews here lately because a girl I work with reads my blog from time to time, but I put in my two weeks notice today so here it all is……
Interview One- was with Sims animal hospital…… I wasn’t too thrilled with it because he said there was no kind of schedule, sometimes you work days sometimes you work nights, sometime weekends, sometimes holidays….They have a policy where you have to volunteer a day before they’ll hire you and they asked me to volunteer this Saturday.
Interview two- was with Stonefield Vets, talked to that vet and he told me they do 3 interviews, one with him, one with the office manager, and one is a “working interview” where you go work a day paid and then they decide. Well, I called today to set up my 2nd interview and the office manager says oh we’ve decided to hire you… so I got that one without the other 2 interviews which is agreat thing. Schedule there will be Monday thru Thursday 1-9 Friday 8-5 and every other Saturday 8-2.
Ok, so this is my dilema….. I’m a softy….. I CHERISH my nighttime rituals with Mikayla. I like reading her a story at bedtime and kissing her goodnight and hearing I love you mommy before she goes to sleep every night, so the whole nightitme schedule thing is kinda getting me down because I’d have to adjust to missing out on all that.
So, I’m going to go in tonight after work and work till 9 at Stonefield, and I’m going to go in Saturday to Sims and volunteer. Bust my ass at both so that both places want me and then over the weekend, sit down with Sean and weigh my options to see which would work better for out family.
I’m really excited about this opening up for me, but at the same time I’m really scared of the change, and I don’t want to upset the ritual that we’ve worked so hard to establish with Mikayla, so I’m kinda torn. But, this is what I want for my career and now I have the chance to begin it so I better jump on it while it’s right in front of me. That and I already gave Dan my two weeks, which by the way I can’t even begin to tell you how good that felt.
Everyone pray for me that I can make the right decision and that I’ll be happy at my new job. =)
And btw, I’ve raised 330 so far on my Making Strides Against Breast Cancer page (which by the way, the link is on my sidebar, it’s called “Please Support Robyn”) So everyone, please go support Robyn!

But I need everyone to let me know what they think I should do?

Problem Solved

Ok, so I talked to my mom last night about moving in with us, and she said she would after all her chemo treatments are done and she has healed up from her surgery. My grandma is the one that takes her to all her appts and grandma won’t drive all the way out to my house so for the time being mom is where she needs to be. I went through all this with Andy Monday night and then yesterday I emailed him telling him that it upset me to have to move, and I’m sure he was like wtf she was alright with it the other day and now she has a problem with it. You have to understand from my point of view, yes you want to move, and with your lifestyle there is no problem with just up and going any old place you choose, but for me that doesn’t work. I have a family to think about and while me and Sean can adapt, I can’t just uproot Mikayla everytime someone is having a crisis. That’s not fair to her and I hadn’t thought that through when I offered to move. After I thought about it I realized that that is the most unfair option for her. Manda said that Mik is young enough that it wouldn’t hurt her to leave her friends but I can’t agree with that. She loves these kids she’s met, she talks about them when we’re at home or out doing something and she recognizes them if we run into one of them at a sotre or park or something so that tells me that she would miss them. I’m not doubting that she could make new friends but children are so impressionable and she already loves these kids, and her teachers, can’t tell you how much I’ve heard about “Ms. Rita” since she started there. So I just can’t leave my home right now. But, I know that Andy needs to leave, he’s not happy with us anymore and that’s fine, it was bound to happen. Like Deena said last night, she seen this coming before we ever moved out of the apartments. But mom saved the day yet again, she’s so good at doing that, and it’ll be exciting to live with my mom for awhile. I can make sure she gets good meals, this was becoming an issue as of late because L.C. refuses to learn to cook and one can only eat so many sandwiches before you’re body goes on strike. I’ll love being able to see her every day and talk to her all the time, so this is going to be a positive change I think.

And on a side note, I love comments, and I really love it when someone completely new stops by and leaves a few words, but please don’t be rude about it. If you don’t agree with something I’ve wrote or if something in my post pisses you off, find a decent way of expressing it, don’t call people names or make fun of them.

Spanx.

Best News in the World

Oh My God! My mom called me today while I was standing in Wendy’s for lunch of all places. She had her Dr. appt. today to see if her chemo is working or not… Well, I answer the phone and she’s crying so I immediately start crying too thinking the worst and she says ‘ready for me to make your day?’ then she proceeded to tell me that the tumor on her liver has shrunk half it’s size already and that they plan on doing 4 more chemo treatments and then schedule her for surgery to remove the rest. They are also going to give her some sort of shots that will help to regulate her blood counts so they don’t drop too low again. She’s had to miss 3 treatments because her blood cells were too low so the tumor shrunk that much with just 3 treatments, maybe the remaining 4 treatments will just eliminate it with no need for surgery.
I have been praying and praying and praying for good news. And I got it, so thank you God for listening to me and for agreeing that this world still needs my mommy. (Like God really reads blogs huh?) But it’s the thought I guess.
I can’t even begin to describe how relieved I feel right now, it’s like beofre I was trying to hold up a building with just my shoulders and today I gave it one good heave and straightened it out again. The pressure is gone, my mind is clear, my eyes are dry. My life is back to normal, my mom is here for a while longer, Mik still has her grandma to lay on and to read and sing with, and I still have my mom to turn to when no one else can help me. Thank you god again….. my savior.

Here we go again

Ok, so yesterday Andy sent me this email talking about how sad he is and how nothings going right and this and that, so I wrot him back like 4 pages telling him in my opinion why everythings going to shit for him. I’m not gonna get into all that on here because I odn’t think he’d want me to share too much but the fat and skinny of it is that he feels that he can’t be truly happy until he moves to Cali with his frined Chell, which honsetly to me is just another cop out…. An deasy way out of a problem that he should have to stick around and fix for good but whatever, his life not mine. So now we have to move again. I was so excited thinking that we were gonna live somewhere for longer than a year this time. Mik loves this house, we just got her into her daycare around the corner, she’s used to that she adjusted well and now we have to turn around pack up and move yet again, and in that, we have to switch her daycare too because it’ll be too far from home if we move. Yippee!
Went for a walk with Andy last night to try and help him clear his head a bit, and we got all this out in the open, and I’m ok with moving or whatever, just a little bitter about it. When Andy needed a place to stay, we let him move into our apt. and when we decided that was too small for all of us, we got this house. I LOVE this house. If I knew it was just going to be a one year only thing, then we would have never moved in together to begin with.
When we first discussed moving in together, we told Andy it would have to be a long term thing because of Mik and her getting attached to people or whatever and we all said that it’d be years and years of living together. A quote from Andy was "It’s always been a dream of mine to live in a house with friends". Guess the dream is over now.Now don’t get me wrong, I love andy very very much, he’s a great friend, but this is kinda bullshit.. When we were talking about all this last night I was fine with it all, but then I told Sean about moving and the look on his face broke my heart, thinking about it right now is breaking my heart. He doesn’t want to move just as much as I don’t want to move. I’m going to talk to my mom and see if she’d move with us just as a favor for a year. It would be the biggest favor of all if she would but I don’t think she will. I odn’t even know for sure that she can afford to right now but we’ll see.
I know Andy is going to read this and think to himself, um none of this was a problem last night but that was before I seen the look on Seans face. I can’t deal with that, I have to much else to deal with. Andy asked me last night how I can go through life and just let bad things happen without always freaking out about it all, and I told him having faith is what keeps me sane, and I know a lot of people don’t believe that way and that’s fine. You don’t have to believe the same way I do, I’m not saying your wrong, I’m not even saying I’m right I’m just saying that that is what works for me, and keeps peace in my heart so that’s what I’m sticking with. Not sure if he agreed or not though.
I’m just kinda sad today because now I have to worry about uprooting my family once again. Me and Sean can adjust to whatever comes our way but Mikayla is a baby still, she doesn’t understand why she’s lived in 3 different places in the 3 years she’s been born, now it’s gonna be 4 and we’ll have to change her daycare on top of all that, it’s really unfair to her and I hope she doesn’t have a hard time getting used to it. I don’t want to ask Andy to stick around for another year because I’d have to go everyday knowing that in his head somewhere he’s thinking that he’s being forced to be unhappy, and that’s not what I want. I want him to be happy and if going clear across the country is what he needs then bon voyage I suppose. Andy hasn’t been happy in months, and really I think some of it is either me or sean and he’s just not saying that.
Dr. Cobban at our old church once told me and Sean when we were upset about mary and Richard's situation...... He said that we were Missionaires, we are always willing to help people out when they have noone to turn to, and he said it was amazing that we did this so open heartedly because we've never been people with a lot of money or means to support anyone, yet we will still never turn someone down. Thats how my faith works through me I guess, maybe thats what God put us here for and I should stop bitching about it and be grateful that I was given a gift like that. I don't know, I guess the answers will come as quickly as the problems do.
I wish I had money to move to wherever I wanted to, I wish Andy could just be happy with anything cause once he moves and gets settled and runs into a snag he’ll be right back where he is now because he’s like that, he lets little things build up until he explodes. I wish I coul dstay in my house, I wish my mom wasn’t sick, I wish I had a better paying job, I wish I was settled. 26 years old and no clue. Fucking A!

Take a deep breath.........

Ahhhh, this weekend was so relaxing. Me, Sean and Billy went up to the Gorge Friday thru Sunday, and it was awesome (as usual). We camped on a totally different side of the gorge then we’re used to, this side was what they call Clifty Wilderness so there was no stream close by, which was kinda weird. I’ve never camped their before without water nearby. I think I like having water better just so you have a place to wash your hands and whatever if you need to.
So we get there Friday thinking we are gonna be the only ones because all day Friday we were by ourself. Go to sleep Friday night, wake up probably around 2 to the sounds of people setting up their campsite across from us, so they kept us up for about an hour and we finally dozed back off. I guess they just got their late and didn’t want to NOT be able to party their first night, they weren’t obnoxious or anything, just kinda noisy for 2 in th emorning. Saturday we woke up and just sat around the fire and walked around our site and the hill behind it for a bit and then went into town for more ice, and new batteries because I thought the batteries in my camera died…. Turns out it was just my camera that died DAMNIT! So no pics of this weekend for me. Saturday night the drunkards came over an invited us to come get sloshed with them, we turned them down. We were more than happy to just sit at our site and relax and get high. Hehe We smoked so much pot this weekend lol, seems like every time I turned around Sean or Billy was handing me a blunt, hehe. They were so trashed over there though that they started plaing Truth or Dare and that game is a never a good idea lol so every so often we’d look up and see one of them running naked around their campfire hehe, it was entertaining at least. Someone ended up getting pissed off though and they all passed out so for the rest of the night it was so quiet. We stayed up till prolly about 2 or 3 Saturday night, woke up Sunday and packed up for home. All in all it was a perfect weekend, wish we could have had at least one more night though. I Love Camping.
Came home to a filthy, filthy house. I knew it was a mess when we leaft and I dind’t have time to fuck with it but I was hoping Andy would have at least loaded maybe one load into the dishwasher but nope, no dishes done, trash overflowing, door unlocked, mail in box….. sigh…….. I understand Andy’s whole not wanting to wash OUR dishes and that’s fine I wouldn’t want to wash other peoples dishes either but everytime I do dishes, quite a few of them are his and I don’t just leave them for him because he was the one that used them, I go ahead and wash them because that’s just retarded. Somethings gotta give with these fucking dishes though or I’m gonna put them all in a box in the garage and live out of the microwave because I’m not sally fucking homemamker.
Moms reults from her ct scan is tomorrow, so we’ll know by tomorrow if her chemo is working, I really, really hope it is, I’m so nervous about all this right now. I have na interview tomorrow with a vet also and I’m not sure how I’m gonna handle everything if she gets bad news and then I have to go into this interview knowing she got bad news…. Ho hum……
Well sitting here at work so guess I better get to work. Hope everyone had as good of a weekend as I did.

argh

I just have to say……. Having a study partner rocks! I was really sucking at my Biology course in school, so I got on the forums and requested a study partner that was also having difficulty in this course. Well, a chick named Amy wrote me back and said she’d like to be my study buddy hehe. Sooo, talked on the phone to her last night, the way we’ve been doing it is that we both work on our exams on our own, then before we submit them we call each other and compare answers, if we both got the same answer for a particular question, then we know that chances are we are right since we both got the same thing, and if our answers don’t match then we say ok I found my answer on this page and then we both look it up and find the right one….. But anyway, I went from getting 70 something scores to getting a 94 last night on my third exam… woo-hoo! I was so excited. 90’s are more like it for me…. I can’t handle 70 ish scores, that just doesn’t
make me very happy.
So, my honey has been being awfulyl sweet to me lately, not that he’s normally an asshole or anything, but he’s just not always super sweet like he has been. I don’t know if he’s done something wrong, or what lol but I like it. =) He left the other night to take his brother home and after he’d went outside and got in his truck, he turned around came back in and I looked at him and said “Forget something” and he said “yep” and gave me a kiss, and then left. Awwwwwwwwwww…. Such a sweet muffin. Hehe
Well, I’m having Shannon help me revise my resume so that it sounds better and I’m gonna start posting it everywhere. I sent it to 5 vet offices yesterday so maybe I’ll hear something from one of them. I’d do anything at this point so long as I get paid what I’m getting paid here which isn’t anything to brag about so it shouldn’t be too hard to find elsewhere. I asked Dan yesterday if I could leave early Friday cause we’re going camping this weekend and I’d like to leave around noon Friday if I can and Dan said “You need to leave early AGAIN?” Like I leave a wholel ot or something. Fuck that, I hardly ever leave anymore, I don’t even go out to lunch anymore, I sit here all day every day and do my work. I always get my shit done on time and there doesn’t seem to be a problem when anyone else leaves for hours at a time so what’ th ebig fucking deal when I do it? And I already know the answer I’ll ge tif I asked that…. “well you answer the phones” Like noone else here is capable of answering a fucking phone or something. And I know Brandi reads my blog and I’m sure this will get shared with everyone else just like everything else does but I don’t really give a shit anymore. What’s he gonna do fire me for looking for a new job? Wouldn’t be the first time that’s happened to me, and I can get unemployment from here so fuck it. But yep, hopefully one day soon I’ll be able to say Hey dan…. Here’s my letter of resignation….. Sweet!

The Roxy files

What all happened this weekend you ask? Well, Friday.... um, I can't remember that far back lol. Saturday we went and picked my Grandma up and went to the Middletown Festival. The church we used to go to has a play in it every year an dmy uncle was in it this year so we went and watched that, and walked around for a bit. Took Grandma home and was feinding for a smoke so we stopped at the gas station by her house to get some and Donnie walks out the door. Donnie is my cousins real dad, and he's always had a bad problem with alcohol so you'd see him for a while, then he'd disappear for a year or so and then you'd see him again and then he'd disappear again. Haven't seen him since Mik was a newborn though so it was kind anice to chat with him for a bit, he seemed sober. He was telling me about his girlfriend, she had cancer and just recently passed away from it, so he was kinda sad still about it. But he showed me pics of the land she had and had left him and it made me feel good for him. Donnie has his problems, and I admit I've badmouthed him fromtime to time because he's stolen things fromme before and he's never been any kind of parent to Brian, not that his mom was either but that's another story. But I hope against hope that Donnie has straightened his life out and can upkeep this land and live happily ever after finally. And maybe one day when all of Brians feelings toward him have changed, that they to can finally have a relationship with each other.
My mom has her ct scan Friday to determine if the chemo is going to work or if she's just a sitting duck, I'm praying so hard that it's working great, working better than they'd expected and that her tumor has already shrunk considerably and that she'll be alright and with me for another 30 years.... That would be so awesome! Everyone say a prayer for her please....
Gave Roxy a bath yesterday, and shaved her butt hehe. That sounds funny but she looks so much better since we did it. She had these long hairs growing off her hindlegs and they were so matted that you just couldn't brush them so we just shaved them off. Gave her a good flea dip, took her for a walk and then let her chill in the house for a couple hours since she smelled so pretty. She's really a beautiful dog, and so well behaved. =) The cats don't even mind her being inside too much.
Going to the Gorge this weekend, couldn't be more excited if I tried. I LOVE camping. It was gonna be just Me and my Muffin but his brother and a couple of his friends wanna go too and thats fine with me, Billy has cool friends. Should be lots of fun. We only get to say 2 nights though and generally thats just not enough for me but if it's all I can get then I'll still take it. =)
Sitting at work all by myself, Tina was sick today, seems like everyones getting sick here lately... Keep that shit away from me. Everyone else has gone home so I have an hour and a half to play on the internet... hehe.... Better get started. =)

Yea old survey. hehe

How tall are you? 5' 2" What's your weight? Um about 120 or so...... Do you own a gun? Nope, but I'd someday like to have a small one Have you ever killed an animal? Not on purpose, I've ran over one or two though. Are you Irish? somewhat What do you think of hot dogs? I really like hotdogs, but they give me indegestion =) What's your favorite Christmas song? Hark hear the bells sung by a choir What is your favorite smell? Baby shampoo What do you prefer to drink in the morning?anything carbonated Do you do push-ups? Sometimes. Have you ever done ecstasy? Nope, I'm scared of it Have you been shot? don't believe so Have you ever been hospitalized? yes, twice been there more times than I can count though. Do you like painkillers? yep if I need them. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex (or same sex)? um, I don't think I have one. Do you own a knife? yep, got a whole drawer full of em, right next to the forks hehe Do you have A.D.D.? Well, for dinner I had some corn and noodles and Faye is trying to get out of the room right now and I like riding bikes.. wait..what was the question? Do you love the pain a tattoo brings? oooo yea..... love it. What's In Your CD Player? ummm.... a cd? What's Under Your Bed? prolly a kitty cat. What Time Did You Wake Up Today? 735 blah! What Time Did You Go To Bed Last Night? around 11. What are you wearing? My capris, green shirt and the most comfyist drawers I own. Current Worry? My mommy's health Current Love? My kiddo and my muffin Current Hate? Can't really say that I actually *hate* anyone Favorite Place To Be? with my family at home Least Favorite Place? definitley work. Favorite Colors? Green One person From Your Past You Wish You Could be with Right Now? hmmm... my daddy Where Would You Like To Go? Camping Where Do you want to live? In the country Favorite food? Fruit Color of most clothes you own? black prolly Number of pillows you sleep with? Just one, and I use Sean as a pillow alot too. What do you wear when you go to sleep? sleepy pants and a tanktop What were you doing 12AM last night? snoozin What do you think you'll be doing in 10 years? Same thing I'm doing now, cept I'll be fighting off boys trying to date my kliddo. Are you paranoid? Only when I smoke weed hehe Do you burn or tan? eh, I burn if I'm in the sun too long but only once. First piercing/tattoo? First piercing was my belly button (besides my ears of course, I think I got them pierced the first time when I was like 4 or so) First tattoo was on my ankle when I turned 18. Then a second, then a third hehe Last person you yelled at?Sean... just a few minutes ago lol Latest crush? Sean, then I asked him to marry me. hehe Last thing you ate? um, noodles, corn and half a salisbury steak If you could be a pirate, would you? yep... argh! What songs do you sing in the shower? the last thing I heard on the radio When and why did you last vomit? um, not really something I keep track of What's in your pockets right now? my paycheck and some change. hehe prolly lint too. =) What color are your bedroom walls? eggshell Last thing that made you laugh? Faye as she fell backwards from trying to climb the baby gate Best bed sheets you had as a child? lol no idea.... Any pets now? ah geez.... 2 cats, zoe and boots, 2 ferrets faye and sandy and a dog, roxy the st. bernard Inny or an outty? Inny Do you have any piercings? well none that I wear anymore. Have 6 holes in each ear, belly pierced before, eyebrow pierced before, tongue pierced before... If you were a CRAYOLA crayon what colour would you be: Green.... Have u ever won any awards: yea quite a few actually.. How many TV's do you have in your house: 3 I think. Have you ever sprained/broken/fractured a bone or gotten stitches?Had a wreck once and broke a finger in two places, and my jaw. Um, had many many sprains and had stitches all over my face and inside my throat from my wreck and had staples from having a c-section. Who do you tell your dreams to? Sean If you could pick one person to make out with who would it be? Lordy..... um, if I could only pick *one* (besides my muffin of course, I'd pick Matt Damon cause he's hot. hehe What do you think of the person who posted this before you? Don't even know her, seen it on a blog and it looked interesting. =) Was it?

Is the treatment really worth it?

So, Seans boss is constantly like on him about doing shit that he wasn’t aware he had to do and then John (his boss) will be like well why dind’t you do this? Um asshole, I’m not a fucking mindreader. This man has fired 5 people since Sean got the job, and that’s barely been a month, and he’s always saying shit to people, even his longtime employees like “We need to assess your position and see if you’re still an asset to this company” Like scaring your employees on a daily basis is any way of running a business. What a dick. To some people, they’d be like oh just let it roll off your shoulders but to people like Me and Sean who’s livelyhood would fall apart if either of us lost our jobs, it’s kinda stressful to know your boss like to fire people on a whim. Sean likes it there but he needs a job that he knows he’s stable at, not something where you have to worry every single day about crossing your boss the wrong way. Noone like to walk on eggshells all the time. He’ll stay for the time being though, he really loves it there and loves the people he works with and the work he’s doing, and in his opinion he’s getting pretty good at it, but I guess John sees it differently.

On a different note, Mom went in for her chemo today and they told her they wouldn’t do it because her white and red blood counts were too low still. The chemo causes these counts to go down but that’s why they wait 2 weeks between treatments. The levels will generally level themselves out after 2 weeks, but they didn’t this time. I’m not sure what this means though, I don’t know if it’s a bad sign or not. Mom has a convention this weekend that she’s going to and my grandma keeps telling her not to because with them being low shes sucseptable to infections easier, but she told her that this might be the last one she has the chance to go to (meaning what if the cancer kills her) and I hate it when she thinks like that, but I guess that’s really the only way to think about it… I dunno. I just knows it sure does a number on me.

And some of her friends hehe. 

Kinda blurry, but this is her classroom 

A little breakfast changed her mind =) 

First day of Pre-School... didn't wanna let go of daddy. Almost broke moms heart. 

Lazy Zoe on her tree 

My Bootsie kitty. This picture doesn't do her a lot of justice, she's really a BIG cat. =) 

Playground 

Pushin her on da swing 

Me and Mik again =) 

Me and Mik looking at the river 

Me and Mik running 

Mik and Daddy looking at the water 

Mik in the car 

These are all from the park we went to over the weekend with Mark and Manda. See our lovely Ohio River??? Watch out for the 6 eyed fishes. =) 

Lookie Lookie

Yay! I finally figured out Hello to get pics on here.. Woo-hoo go me, I’m so smart sometimes I amaze myself hehe. Haven’t done much today but update my blog a little and make some new blog friends, cause I don’t get enough comments to satisfy myself, hehe. I wish it were 430 though, I’m so ready to go home… finished with all my work for the day and don’t have much else to do and I’m bored. Ben’s here so I don’t really wanna play online too much cause he gets pissed if he catches me hehe. Wanna know something that aggravates me though? I’ve blogged about this before but it is still bugging me so I’m gonna talk about it again…. And again…. And again… if I have to! I really, really, really hate it when I’m on the phone or trying to get something done for someone and the phone is rinigng and NOONE will answer it. I was sitting in Dennis’ office earlier on hold with one of the trash companys and the phone was ringing and Dennis doesn’t hear too well but he could hear it ringing and he said “Is anyone gonna get that before they hang up” and I just smiled cause I think that’s everyones goal, to listen to it ring long enough that the person to finally just hang up. I understand that answering the phones is my job, well part of it anyway, and I generally do answer it all the time, but there are times that someone else needs to help me a little.. C’Mon lazy fuckers, it’s just a phone call.. a simple hello can I help you, what the hell is the big deal with that? And then if it’s someone important and it doesn’t get answered they bitch to Dan and it comes back on me…. Well excuse the fuck out of me if I was busy doing something else and one of your OTHER employees couldn’t grab the phone…. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR……. C’mon school…… be over already, I can’t wait for the days of taking care of animals that can’t talk shit to me!

Mik and Red Rose 

My Kiddo at her 3rd Birthday Party 

Mik and her Daddy at the Zoo. I have so many really cute pics of Mik and Sean.... Someone needs to start taking ones of Me and Mik damnit! lol 

My adorable kiddo at Mandas house 

Mik and Roxy prolly about a year and a half ago because this was at the apartment we used to live at. Roxy's just a pup in this one too. 

This is Me Deena and Sean from about a year ago.... trying to sort through some pics so I figured I'd publish the good ones hehe. 

I just ran across this picture again... This is of my St. bernard Roxy when she was just a tiny little thing.. HA! But I think it's just too cute. 

Cancer

I've been meaning to let everyone know this also. I've posted the story of my mom and her fight with cancer. Well, for the 4th year in a row now I'm doing the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer walk. I've set up an online donation website so people can go and donate with a debit or credit card. Please try to donate to this cause, even if it's just a dollar or two, it all adds up and it helps very very much. I know everyones focus right now is with Katrina and I'm not trying to belittle their needs at all but Cancer is something that has been around for ages, will continue to be around and almost everyone knows someone that has been affected by this horrible, scary disease. So please try to donate a few dollars, here's the link to my personal site and there s also a link to it on my sidebar entitled "Please Support Robyn". http://www.kintera.org/faf/donorReg/donorPledge.asp?ievent=107282&supId=56495719
And in case you're able, the link titled "How Big is your Heart?" is the link to the red cross for Katrina relief. Thanks again everyone! It means the world to me!!!!!

Positive isn't good

I have these friends, Mary and Richard. They are the type of people that drama just surrounds constantly, something MAJOR is always going on with them. And half the time you wonder to yourself wether or not they are full of shit about most of it. Well, Mary has always said that her sister, Suzie had Aids. We know Suzie, hung out with her on many occasions, and you can tell just by looking at her that she’s not the healthiest, BUT….. we figured if Mary was lieing then Suzie looks like she does because of her many drug habits and the general ghettoness that she makes herself live in. She’s always in and out of jail for something or the other, and just looks overall rough. Well, Richard calls last night to tell us that Suzie died day before yesterday. =( To me that’s really sad. I didn’t know her well enough to be upset about it or anything, but I know for Mary it’s gotta be rough to deal with something like that. I’ve known 2 people in my lifetime that have had aids, one was her and the other was a boy named freddy in elementary school, and both of them are dead. What a sad disease.

My 2 cents

Ok, so I heard someone bad mouthing the war thats going on. That kinda pisses me off, they were all talking about the lilitary like it was their fault it's gone on so long for no reason or whatever, and no matter what you're feelings are on our stupid President and his decisions and whether or not you believe the war is necassary or not, don't bad mouth the military over it. This wasn't their fault, they are just doing their jobs... They go where they are told to go, and they do what is necesary at that time.... Anyway, it pissed me off so I wrote a poem about it.. Wanna hear it, here it go.... hehe

Be proud of your sons and daughters,
They are the ones that pave our way.
When you think that you have it rough,
Try to live their lives one day.
Foreign soil, and faces and lives are all too familiar to them,
When they’d rather be home with their familes, they are out fighting for us instead.
So say a prayer for their well being every night before you sleep…
And when the news of one MIA or KIA comes up, take the time to weep.
For that was someones child, that just died for your rights
Think of that as you tuck your babies in soundly every night.

Wonderful Wonderful In Laws

Ok, so Linda bought her a new car (again). Well Monday Billy calls us and asks Sean if he’d come get him and take him to the mall so he can get his haircut because he has inspection today (Tues.), so naturally Sean was like, well why can’t you drive yourself up there? And Billy says that Shannon has the car, and so Sean has Billy call Shannon at Niks on 3-way and ask if she’ll come get him cause we were getting ready to take Mik to the park for awhile. Well, you can hear Nik hollering in the background “Today is my day off and Shannons not taking anyone anywhere unless it’s me” Like what the fuck kind of say does Nik think he has on Lindas car? So Sean tells Billy he’ll come pick him up later and cut his hair for him. All this happened around 1 or so, Sean goes to get Billy around 5 and the car is still gone but guess who’s car is sitting out in the front of the house? NIKS…. Now how much bullshit is it that Nik has a friggin car, yet it’s ok for him and shannon to take her moms instead? That’s crap in my opinion. Shannon is a grown adult, she’s 23 years old, she’s had a full time job since she got out of high school, which was what 5 years ago? 5 years?????? And the bitch still can’t buy her own car??? If she’d stop shopping and buying her fat ass tons of clothes then maybe she could grow up and do some grown up things, like BUY A CAR and HELP PAY BILLS. I lived at home until I was 20, but I helped with the electric bill, paid my own car insurance and always helped make dinner and clean up afterwards. It’s not a matter of money, it’s a matter of respect. She could at least help around the house, at the very least, but she doesn’t and she leaves a mess everywhere, you can’t even walk in her room and her whiny ass sleeps in the living room on the couch half the time. Sean said something to his mom last night about it but Linda being Linda just came up with excuse after excuse as to why it’s alright, yet she won’t hesitate to email me complaing about her bills an dhow she’s gonna have to find a second job because she’s so broke. Well, if you’re that worried about money…. KICK YOUR FREELOADING DAUGHTER OUT! I would say it must be nice to have a totally free ride, but I don’t think that would be nice. As much as I hate having to pay bills every month, I do love that I can be responsible enough to do it. I love knowing that me and Sean support our family, I love walking in my house every day and knowing that I’ve worked hard for that house. It gives you a good feeling despite the troubles of being broke sometimes.
But it really aggravates me because both Linda and Shannon treat Billy like the wicked step child of the family, not that they treat Sean like he’s anything special either but Seans older than Billy, he could give a shit. Billy still lives there, and although he never really says much about it, it’s got to hurt his feelings to know that his bitch ass worthless sister means more to his mom than he does. I don’t know what it is about Shannon that Linda thinks is so damned special, but it gets really annoying after awhile. She works yea, but for nothing. She doesn’t help with any of the bills, she doesn’t help pay for the car or the insurance. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t plan on kicking Mik out the day she turns 18 or anything, but she will contribute if she wants to live with us still. That’s how it should be, you’d never learn responsibility if someone just gives gives gives to you your whole life. Shannons going to be in for a rude awakening when and IF she ever moves out of her mommys house. Love the in-laws!

Labor Day

Got out of the shower yesterday afternoon, walked out into the living room and guess who was sitting on my couch? Shannon and Adam. Shannon is getting to good at this keep shit from Robyn crap..... don't think I like that too much. =) She says Adam wanted to come see us for the long weekend cause he loves us so much. =) Which is totally understandable...... how could you not love me that much? hehe
Deena's brother and his girlfriend are in town right now too, so Friday night we had everyone over to hang out and visit with them. It's kinda nice to see Tim, haven't seen him since before I had Mik. He was in town right after I had her but I don't remember if I seen them or not then, I think I did but I'm a pothead and can't remember. =)
Gonna drop my GRUMPY kid off at Lindas this afternoon and go out to eat with Shannon, Adam, Grandma, Harold, Mom and L.C. Yay Golden Corral! =) And yay for long weekends too! Gonna go to the gorge in a couple weeks, pretty excited about that. No past time I love any more than camping!! And this trip will make 3 for me for the year. Pretty fucking neat considering that since Mik has been here, we've only gotten to go once a year, and this year we'll get to have 3 trips. I cant wait till she's a little older so she can go too. I hope she loves camping like we do. =)

My poor Mickey Leigh

Wanted to say Congrats to Manda for being such a Sexy Bitch! She beat out the booby girl on Sfr's Office Hotty of the month... Woo-Hoo Go manda it's your burfday! =) Well, actually it could be considered a burfday present huh since yours is in August. =) I better be on your list of fellow employees though, I want some Moes.

Made Mik a doctors appt. today. She kept telling me and my mom that her cheekbone hurt and it hurt inside her mouth when she swallowed so I don't know if she's got a sinus infection or maybe a molar or something coming in but I gotta get rid of this fever. Fever scares me, specially if it hangs around a few days like it has. Poor baby was shivering in bed last night cause of her fever, broke my heart. I just went and gave her another blankie and scratched her back til she fell asleep, she slept pretty good. Hopefully the doctor can fix her up though.