Yeah, she did it again. Lets all flip out now.

You have no idea how many times I hear, "please don't tell anyone else about this Robyn, or put it on that thing you do on the computer" (which would be this... or facebook) Now when I hear this phrase being said to me, it's usually after something has happened that I can't actually list an example of because I promised I would "never put that on that thing you do on the computer" and I don't break promises to this person unless it's an emergency. BUT, i WILL say this much..... when I hear that phrase spoken to me, something that is a very clear clear symptom or warning sign that ~something~ is wrong -upstairs-, if you catch my drift.

Now whatever it is thats wrong -upstairs- isn't an everyday thing, but it can happen to such a degree that causes somewhat dangerous situations to occur. Now when these situations occur, WHO is the one who immediatly drops anything, including work, (I cant tell you how many times I left my job at Blimpies in a hurry just to do something that needed immediate assistance or were going to harm someone or become HUGE problems)... point is... I am the one who gets called to fix the problem... ME, and NOONE else but ME. Couple others claim they do it too, but those couple others have been around maybe..... 4 times total in like 4 months.... Hell theres a project from LAST fall that has yet to be finished... Sean, me and a few friends are the ones who did about 85% of it to begin with, then something sort of like today happened and we were told basically that we were worthless failures and needed to get out... so we stopped that project and guess what???? Its in the EXACT shape we left it in..... because the original people were supposed to finish it once we were out of the way have NEVER come back to do a single thing on it since.... had we not been stopped it would have been finished over a year ago like it should have been.... but no..... hell i got threatened of being hit in the face even over that particular situation. HIT in the face... (over wall paint btw, archive my previous posts if you'd like the story, it's there somewhere)

There was another time when a cousin of mine TRASHED my her basement... had 14 dogs at one time just running loose... he didnt even live there, I was the one who fed and watered and let them out every day, but these dogs ended up putting this basement into a state that the health department would have condemned and thats nowhere near an exageration either... One again, go thru the archives and you can find the pictures... it was like off an episode of billy the exterminator vs hoarders all in one... my ENTIRE family refused to go to her house any longer... REFUSED.... they all REFUSED to help clean it also, even the one who caused it refused to help clean it... but who finally got tired of watching her cry over the things they'd say about her??? oh yeah, that was ME...... who is it always? ME..

I'm not looking for an award... don't think that... I'm just looking for a little gratification and appreciation... I wake up almost daily with a *to do* list in order to copntinue living where I was living... I contribute 480 a month in food to the house as well... I always complete my *chores*, then I do the dishes and sweep all the floors.... then once a week I do everyone in the houses laundry.... I even fold it for them after I get it out of the dryer.... I cook dinner every single night, then while everyone rushes off to watch their tv shows, I also CLEAN all the dishes and cookware from dinner, and put away any leftovers... then I clean the entire kitchen, and make my uncle some desert.... EVERY NIGHT. I read a sign on someones wall once that said "the cook never has to clean" I'd like to see a day that happened for me. I then clean the coffee pot, and put coffee in it and get it ready to just turn on the next day.... and I don't even drink coffee. Oh, almost forgot, Once a month, I clean my uncles room and bathroom for him too.

Now, I'm a 32 year old adult... I do have a life, and occasionally I like to go out with friends and do something outside my house.... Whenever I do one of these things, I'm required to leave a number I can be reached at... make it known where I'm going and when I'll be back. And again, this is no joking or exageration... and if I'm late, the entire house is pissed off at me for being unreliable or a flat out liar.

Now, every time I've ever lived at where I'm living now, I've had cats.... When Amanda lived there she had 2 cats... in the same room I'm living in now... when mom lived there, she had 3 cats... and a dog.. in the same room I'm living in now, and also when she moved to the basement. Everytime I've lived there, in the room I'm in now, in the basement, and in the room upstairs that is now harolds room... I've had 2 cats..... my gma refuses to believe me anytime I tell her this... she swears on everything holy that she's never allowed cats in her house..... um, yeah ok..... then of course, my cousin had 14 dogs. and theres also been birds, gerbils, ducks, and a pot bellied pig that lived in that house either thru me, manda or my mom.... but again.... "theres never been anything but a dog.. and only 2 of them at a time" yeah, it takes 2 of them to make puppies.. lol and theres been 4 litters of puppies born in the basement...... whatever though, thats not the point... lol

Point is, I bend over backwards to do everything, everything, everything in the house I'm in.... no one but me has had to run a sweeper, wash a dish or polish anything since I've been there.. I even polished the banister and all the fucking steps going upstairs.... not to mention, sean and I were the ones who stained the porch, and repaired a lot of the fence (that sean and I built for her back in 99)(which she also swears up and down that him and I had nothing to do with it) we were th eonly 2 who were even there..... built the entire thing.... I fucking know this for fact cuz I stepped on a rusty ass nail building the mother fucker and had to get a tetnus booster..... can't forget shit like that....

again though, not the point.... my point is this.... 3 days ago, Sean and I split up, and he was supposed to bring me my car and a little money so I could go get the cats some litter to change their box, which admitly did really smell bad.. but it was only on day 3 of not being changed.. it's not like it sat for 2 weeks just reeking.. and it's in the fucking basement that NO one goes in but me anyway.... ugh... anyway... I couldn't get the litter til today... had just got back to the house, litter in hand and was informed before I even made it inside that Mikayla and I had a week to move out. She told me I wasn't holding up my end of the bargain... my cats box stunk and my room was a mess.... Oh No.... My uncle can piss on the carpet when he misses the toilet at least twice a day... but my cats box was maybe 2 days overdue...... it may rain frogs people.... be careful if you go out... wtf???

My husband just left me... I'm searching for a job, and tomorrow is the 5 year anniversary of when my mom died. My daughter is coping with her daddy not seeing her til after the first of the month because we have lied to her and told her that he's out of town working.... and then I'm told I need to move the fuck out basically cause I'm being accused of being lazy...

Ok. I'll move. Already left actually. I had an option luckily although it's not the way I was wanting to do things..... but still...... wonder who she will find to climb up on a ladder each morning to roll up the blind on her backdoor.. See it doesn't pull roll anymore like it should and she can't stand if theres no light coming in.. so without me to do it, SHE will be climbing that ladder each and every day. Grandma sometimes stumbles walking on flat ground, you really think she needs to climb a ladder every day? Or wait, better yet, do you really think anyone will travel all the way to her house to do this for her every morning???? Um, HA I say....... then everyone will all sit around just absolutly baffled... can't understand how it happened when she falls doing this simple task..... and all the rides she needs.. and NO ONE will take her? Guess she'll be driving them herself now.... stay off the sidewalk people... she nailed someones house trying to go thru an alley and bent the fuck out of her fender not but amonth ago.... my cousin was able to fix it (because NO ONE else would come look at it for her) but he also traced it to the exact spot she hit.. and it was a house.... she claims it was a curb.....

it's just things like that.... I do more than anyone realizes.... she won't even udnersand half the mail she gets anymore without someone there to comprehend it and explain it to her....

But Robyn had a full can of trash in her room and a stinky cat litter box..... I can totally see how that voids out everything else I do and warrants an eviction.

Everyone has questioned me for years why I don't think of family any higher than I do.... maybe if people would actually open their eyes and realize whats actually going on, they'd understand....

Until then, I have my daughter, I have my memories, and I can stand proudly and claim that I, of anyone I know, am one hell of a person.... and if others don't see it too, they can kiss my ass.

xoxo ungrateful assholes.