weekend plans

Busy, Busy weekend coming up. Tomorrow I'm going out to see an old friend of mine that I used to work with. It's her step-daughters birthday, and they have a big party planned for her so we're gonna take Mik to play. =) Should be all kinds of fun. They've got a big water slide and horses and all kinds of stuff. Mik's gonna love it.

Then Sunday my Grandma is fixing dinner for my family to celebrate my birthday since all my family is always out of town every year for my birthday. It's August 3rd for all those sending gifts, hehe ;) I think Christina is gonna stay with us Sunday night, not for sure yet though.

I need to gather a bunch of females and have a girls night out I think. Sean and Terry went out last night again, and when he got home he mentioned that Amy went with them.. so I was like... ummm..why wasn't Robyn invited too then? Assholes lol.

Get to go see Widespread Panic on the 1st of August.. I can't flippin wait for that... get my skinny ass in the pit.. hehe =) I love a good concert, been awhile since I got to go to a good one too, and we're going with a bunch of friends of ours so it should be a blast. Wish I could tak emy camera in with me.. lol

Started my new job at the corner grocery yesterday and I absolutly LUV that job. It's so easy and laid back.. and the people that come in are all friendly and I know half of them lol. Lived in this neighborhood most my life, I can't walk down the street without running into someone. =)

So, Hospice came to check ou tmom yesterday and her tumors have grown so much in her stomach that you cna feel them now thru her skin. And she's gained 10 pounds from the growing. She was having pain in like her elbows and shoulders and Hospice said that the cancer may be moving into her bones now too.

Have I ever mentioned just how much I fucking hate Cancer?

HNT

Wasn't sure whichone to use, so I just used all 3 of em. =) Happy HNT all. Be sure to check out "The other HNT' as well. =)

Gonna kill somebody... got any land I could borrow?

I have a confession to make, Well, it's not my confession, but I'm making it on someones elses behalf.

Mom got a credit card in the mail yesterday. So she asked me to activate it for her, so I did. Well, last night Larry was at her house and I guess she mentioned this card to him. He replies with "God doesn't like scammers" She was like wtf are you talking about? So he told her that her getting these cards and using them knowing she's going to die and not be able to pay them back is scamming the credit companies, and that she won't get into Heaven if she doesn't tear them up.

Now, ok, I guess if you need to think of it that way, then yes it is scamming them, but who fucking cares? Those asshole companies make MORE than enough money off of apr and late fees and whatever else they give fees for that they can afford to write off an account or two. She didn't get it with the intentions of like maxing it out and never paying onit, she's going to make her monthly payments like she should, but if theres a balance owed when she passes, so be it.. They will get over it.

I think a few things about this... For one... Larry can rot for all I care. You don't say shit like Your not getting into heaven to someone that is dieing. And you sure as fuck don't say it to my mother.. that'll do nothing for you but get your ass kicked. Like I said, if she pays it fine, but if she wants to max it out and never make a payment I say go ahead with that too. Fuck, have some fun... you don't have much longer.. Yep it may be dishonest, but there are worse things you could do.

Well, to top that off.. 5 minutes later he starts telling her how he's been practicing Tai-Kuan-Do so that he can threaten L.C. to the point where he'll have a heart attack and die... Now correct me if I'm wrong here, and I'm not one to predict gods word or anything.. But I think that If Mom and Larry were side by side at the Pearly Gates and God looks at their file and moms says "Didn't pay off credit cards" and Larry's says "Attempted to murder an old guy" Who is going to get in? My mommy.... thank you.

I have half a mind to go ver and go off on Larry but he gets me so riled up that I'm not sure it's worth it. He's one of those people that always turn it around to what you're doing wrong and he never does anything and all his problems are caused by someone else and it just pisses me off and I get to where I can't come up with anything to say and that just pisses me off more.. lol So I'm prolly better off to just let it be. I'll just be content to sit on my porch and shoot bb's at his tomatoes at night.. lol yep you read that right.

He also told her last night that she had to choose if she wanted to be his friend or L.C's friend. She told him she didn't "have" to do anything anymore, that she wasn't "with" either of them and could be friends with whoever the fuck she wanted to. So as he was leaving he stood in her door and said "right here, right now.. make your damned choice" and again she told him no she wasn't chosing, so he said "I'll make it for you then, BYE" and left. Well don't let the door hit ya fukker.


On a brighter note...... I got a job today. =) yay. And from what he says it's perfect for me. Will have to wait and see if it really proves to be perfect or not though. lol It's 2-3 nights a week, no more than 3 nights and NO weekends. That's exactly what I was looking for and it's walking distance from me. I do have to work during the day tomorrow from 9-2 just cuz he wants to train me himself and he works during the day but one day is fine with me. So hopefully it works out like I hope. =)

Billy's Girlfriend Christina... Isn't she pretty? 

Sean playing on the playground. He's so silly. ;) 

Sean and Mik playing on the back hoe thingy at the park.. lol 

Mik and her HUGE lolipop from yesterday.. she's still eating on it today. lol 

I'm just loving this picture.. lol Ever find something that looks so good you want to wear it every day? lol 

Me and Manda at Olive Garden..... post below 

Olive Garden was nummy.

Manda took me out to diner last night for my birthday. But let me clarify... It's not my birthday yet.. lol She's going to be out of town on my actual birthday so we went out before she left for vacation. My real birthday isn't until August 3rd. And yep that's a Thursday.. hehe Birthday suit anyone? hehe

But remember, I'll be watching the mail for all my presents to get here....... ;)

Mom started having pain in her side yesterday, her hospice doctors said it was tumor pressure. =( So I guess it's starting now. She wants to avoid going to the hospital if she can so hopefully the pain doesn't get too bad n her. She took like 3 pain pills yesterday though. My poor mommy. =(

I caught Boots coming out of the litter box yesterday... Hopefully thats a sign that she's getting better. I want so badly to be able to keep my kitty, so I keep praying that she re learns what the box is for and that I can control the cystitis myself.

Don't really have too much interesting stuff to talk about today so I'll cut this one short. Gonna go grab Julie and her neice Alana today in a couple hours and go to the park I guess. Mik loves playing with Alana. =)

Tech support anyone? lol

Got a couple technical questions for all you "geeks" out there. lol

1. I "borrowed" a copy of windows from a friend. I knew I had to activate it within 30 days. Well, kept putting it off and now I get an error message saying it must be activated.. So I click on it and it takes me to this windows screen that says "Windows has been activated, click ok to continue" So I click ok, and it goes away and lets me back to my internet. But the error message will still pop up. So I figured maybe I had to go to Seans user account and activate it over there as well. Click on his name, and it take me to the same window that says windows has been activated already, click ok. So I click ok, and it logs him off. I've never actually activated either of them. I dunno what's going on... Any ideas?????
2. How do I enable cookies?


K, enough of that.. lol

Soooo, was supposed to start watching the baby today. Lady called me at like 1230 last night with "oh by the way... I found someone else to watch him" Umm... Nice of ya to let someone know. Geez. So now I'm gonna search for a job again.. lol fun times.

Manda came over yesterday and we went to the Posse Picnic that Mojo held. It was ok, didn't really know too many people but the food was good and Mik had fun at the playground and in the sprinklers. It's nice to hang out with Manda though, never get to see each other much. She's taking me out to dinner tonight for my birthday too. Yay Olive Garden! hehe Haven't heard much mention about the presents you're all sending me.... hehe ;)

Gonna post some pics using hello so they'll all be below this post.. or hell... above it... fuck I dunno..... anyway. Tata.

me 

Sean and Manda at the picnic yesterday 

I'm so cute. lol 

You can tlel how wet Poor Bootsie is in this pic.. And yep you guessed it, this is her covered in orange juice.. lol Poor Cat. 

This was when Uncle Burley came to visit. Mik LOVED her Uncle Burley. Everytime he'd come to visit before, she'd already be in bed.. so this was his first visit with Mikayla. 

Zoes fat ass... I call it "I'm too fat to fit on the couch mom" 

this ones really dark, but it's of my cat Zoe looking at herself in the mirror.. hehe 

my new skirt.. I LUV this thing! Gonna wear it today actually hehe. 

Long Lost Cousins

The starter went out on Seans truck yesterday while he was at work. And my Grandma Bogard was over here when I found out and offered to help us pay for it, so I went with her out to her house so she could write a check for me. (Yea, she did something nice for me.. imagine that.) Anyway, to get to her house we have to drive past the road that Christina lives on, so as we passed it... I mentioned that that was the street Billy's girlfriend lived on. So Grandma says... Yea Shirley and her daughter live down there too. Remember her, she was the one who had triplets? So I told her yep I remembered Shirley. But then I told her that Christina was also a triplet, cept that she was the only girl, her momma had 2 boys as well. Grandma stopped talking for am inute and looked at me and said.... Christina, Patrick, and John? Ummmm.... Yea.

So... turns out.. Christina and her two brothers are my 2nd cousins. My Grandma and their grandma were cousins. Neat huh? Christina's grandma, and great grandma were both at Sean and I's wedding, they remember Sean wearing chains.. hehe. They remember meeting Billy almost 6 years ago. No fear in Christina and Billy being related though thank god.. lol.
Small world huh? I've known this chic for years now and had no clue we were secretly related...

Funniest part though is that this isn't the first time I've found out that I'm related to someone I've known for years. Same thing happened with me and Mark (mandas husband). BUt that relation (i think) has been terminated since my cousin and his cousin got divorced... not sure how that works.. lol

But, theres no way to terminate the relation between Christina and I, so we're cousins on my dads side of the fmaily.. too neat I think. lol I knew I liked her for a reason. hehe And now I don't have to worry that if something happens between her and Billy ever, he can't say "you can't be friends with her anymore" Umm,, yea I can, she's family. =)

Well, gonna run.. Have to take grandma to the store in a bit and I still need to wake up.. lol
Have a great weekend all. =)

Bootsies first bath

This was the conversation between me and Mikayla today.......

Mik: Mom, I need a towel
Me: Why, what'd you spill?
Mik: Nothing... I have to dry Bootsie
Me: Umm... why is Bootsie wet?
Mik: Because I gave her a bath

So I followed my smiling 3 year old back to her room where an ever soaked cat was sitting on her dresser licking herself.....

Me: Waht'd you do to Boots?
Mik: I put shampoo on her
Me: where'd you get the shampoo?

She points to her juice cup thats filled with Sunny D.

Soooooo......... Needless to say, I gave Boots her first bath ever today. Poor sticky orange juice covered cat.. Lol And it's really hard to discipline a kid while you're laughing your ass off too, I just don't think it sinks in if she sees that Mom finds it that damned funny.

Boots did well though, neither her or Zoe are afraid of water but I've never had to give either of them a bath. She didn't "like" it but she didn't struggle with me either, she just whined as I poured water on her and soaped her up. lol She's all clean now though and sitting in the door drying herself off.. lol Poor baby. Funny shit, but poor cat.

Slacker

Yea Yea I know I forgot all about HNT this week. Had too much other shit going on this week. Lol.... I was gonna take one real quick but Sean took my camera to work with him today so no HNT for me today.. Sorry guys.. I'll make it up next week. ;)

Tagged......

Look.... You try to hide off in the corner under a blanket and you still get tagged. Hehe... This is for you ole sexy casted Henrique. =)

5 Things in my Wallet (Purse)
1. License (when it's not lost)
2. Your gonna love this one..... Extra pair of panties... hehe yep. I have a 3 year old.. gotta be prepared for accidents.
3. Money HAHAHAHA lol.... yea I try to keep alittle with me anyway.
4. Address Book, never know who you're gonna need to call
5. Sunblock Stick Yep I'm sooooo scared of cancer anymore.

5 Things in my Closet
1. Massive pile of dirty clothes.. lol
2. Probably a cat or two snoozing
3. A bunch of dresses I'll prolly never wear again
4. Anything that I couldn't find a home for elsewhere in the house.
5. All my camping equipment... for once in my life it has a home. =)

5 Things in the Fridge
1. Pitchers of different types of kool aide and gatorade
2. A 5 gallon box of milk..... don't ask lol
3. Whole basket of blackberries Mik and I picked at the park yesterday
4. One of those baking soda box thingy's to keep everything fresh
5. TONS of leftovers.. lol we always save them and then never eat them.

5 Things in my Car (Cutlass)
1. Change stash... just in case
2. Christinas Shoes.. lol she always forgets to get em when she's here.
3. Stereo in the trunk.. we have to install it still
4. Mik's carseat
5. ummmm..... steering wheel? hehe I'm so funny sometimes. =)


So, my first night at work came and went. Only had to work till 930 though, I start working till 1130 on Thursday. Blah. I don't mind till 9 or 930 but any later than that and I'm gonn hate it.. Not that it matters cuz I was informed last night that when we go to Sc to see Billy graduate, She's gonna fire me anyway cuz I can't take that many days off yet. And I'm not gonna miss his graduation just for Subway. lol Sooooooo, I have a job until Sept. at least. I'll find something else when we get back.. no biggie really. I'll be watching the baby by then too so I'll at least have some sort of income coming in. I don't really tag anyone usually... so if you'd like to do this then feel free just le tme know so I can come see your answers.... and just you wait Henrique... hehe =)

Visits

This weekend was great. =) Saturday night, Christina came to spend the night and Brent came to visit for the day. Took him a bit to find his way here, lol but he made it eventually. Mik took to him immediatly. The second he walked in the door, she grabbed his arm and drug him into her room. They colored, and watched t.v. and ate popcorn and got married. =) Yep, Brent's my son-in-law now. I think he really enjoyed playing with her though. I was so happy that we got to se him too, it's been forever. He stayed till like 1 and we watched "The Hills Have Eyes" which surprisingly enough, is a pretty good movie. I liked it. Mom came over to see him too and we all had dinner togehter. It was nice. =)

Christina and I took Mik down to Waterfront Park yesterday for like 4 hours too. She had a ball.... as she always does lol. Me and Sean started to watch American Pie Band Camp last night, and it sucked lol. So we just went to bed early for once...

I start my job tonight... blah. lol It's not the job I'm not looking forward too, it's the hours. I really really really don't want to work till 1130 at night. But don't have much choice.. At least it's only 3 nights a week. And hopefully I'll be able to get into the demonstrator thing on the weekends and won't have to have a job at night anymore. That's how I'm hoping it works out anyway.

So Billy wrote yesterday and told us that he made Squad Leader. Yay Billy. Can't hold down a Durkin. I hope he's feeling a bit better about everything now, he seems to be. I'm so proud of him.... nothing more pride worthy than becoming a Marine.

I've also been thinking lately... and it's weird too, but I want another kid I think. I mean, I know the doc told me not to have anymore and that it would be in my best interest and all that not to, and I also know that we're not going to have anymore. But sometimes, I think it would be awesome to have another one. =) My kiddo is the best thing in my life and we're finally getting to where everything we do revolves around her and it's sooo much more fun than the way we used to be. It's like.. I can't even explain it.. It's just a different feeling when you know that you have a sucessful happy family and that it's that way because of what you've done. Not what anyone else has done, but what you've done... I love it... why not make it bigger? lol My doctor would kill me though..... and it's not worth the risk so I'll just be overjoyed with my one little princess.... I'll just babysit all the time. =)

Name it

1. Have you ever been accused of something you didn't do?
All the damned time.. Lol. But I don't care. Hehe
2. Have you ever done something bad and didn't get caught?
Lol, yep last night actually.. Well, Sean is the one who actually did it, but I was there.
3. Ever been in trouble with the law?
Nope. I've had a run in or two in my time but nothing that I actually got in trouble for.
4. Ever done something illegal?
As often as I can afford it. LoL
5. Ever been to court?
Yea but nothing major. I had a hardship license and had to go twice for it, and a speeding ticket once before as well. Been one other time as well, but not gonna talk about that.. I was 6 I think.
6. Name two people you want to see soon
Brent and Andy
7. Name two people you can't live without
Sean and Mikayla
8. Name two people who have had the biggest influence on your life...
Sean and Mikayla
9. Name two people you can't stand
Shannon and Larry
10. Name two people you look up to
Grandma and Mom
11. What's one thing you wish you didn't have to do every day?
Wash the flippin dishes... lol
12. What's one thing you'd like to change about your life....
I want more than anything to leave Louisville.
13. What's one thing you do everyday that always brings a smile to your face?
Play with my daughter
14. What's one thing you wish you were doing right now?
Camping.
15. What's one thing you'd change if you could?
Um....... no need to change anything... I wish Mik was 4 inches taller so she could ride the big rides... lol does that count?
16. Name something your doing today....
Hanging out with Christina, she's staying the night... supposed to see brent too but haven't heard from him yet.
17. Name one thing thats happened that changed your life..
Just one? ummm.... birth of my kiddo..... death of my dad....... news about my mom..... I could go on and on. Anything that happens changes your life somehow.
18. Name one thing you've eliminated from your life.....
Bygones. Had a lot of previous drama... decided that what will be is what will be.
19. Name your biggest accomplishment....
My life. I'm so proud of us. We have everything we need and want right now. =)
20. Name your biggest defeat...
My moms cancer.... I feel defeated because of it.


I didn't really have anything interesting to blog about today so I just used this survery thingy that my buddy Ann sent me this morning. =) Hope everyone had a good weekend. =)

Good news is everywhere I look.

Took Mom down to social security the other day and they agreed to reinstate her checks for 6 more months. And that same day, my 2 Uncles, Jim and Harold said that they'd split the costs to get mom into her own apt. still and Jim is gonna pay half her rent each month. So Mom gets to get her own place still. She's so excited. =) I'm so happy for her. Maybe this is a sign that things will start being less stressful for her, I sure hope so.

My buddy Brent is gonna come visit this weekend too. I can't tell ya how excited I am about that. Haven't seen him in forever, and he's gonna come spend the day with us.. Yay! And Andy is coming in in August sometime for Mik's birthday... Could I get any more good news?

Talked to Tracey about babysitting and she agreed to a hundred a week, and I got a job at Subway and they've finally put me on the training list for the demonstrator job. Things are finally turning around.

Yay for good news! I'd talk more but I'm kinda in a hurry, just wanted to update everyone. =)

Everyone smile today.. if for no other reason, then just join me in my long awaited happiness. =)

HNT Revisited

Yea, I'm a lazy bastard. Hehe, I didn't get around to taking an original pic this week so I just went and got the one I've used before that got the most comments (41). I'm learning about my new editing program, this is the watercolor feature in it. Kinda neat. =) Anyway, Have a good one everybody!

Funny Shit.

K, so I stole this off a friend of mines blog but it's too damned true not to pass on. Now I'm not an anti-Christian or anything but there are some things I don't agree with and telling gays they can't marry is one of those things that "really grinds my gears" lol yea let's see who got that one. =)

So anywho.... http://www.atomfilms.com/landing/landingIndex.jsp?id=jesus_off&mature=accept is the link, but if it doesn't work, then just do a Google search for "Keep your Jesus off my Penis" It's waaaaaaay to worth it. =)

I got the job.

Well, had an interview at Subway today. Got it. Not sur eif I'm excited or not though, lol. I really really really don't want to work at night. I'm going to start babysitting the ladies newborn across the street in August as long as she's willing to pay me what I want, which is a hundred. I don't think that's too much for a full week of babysitting a special needs newborn. The way I see it is that daycare is like 150 a week, so she's getting a deal with me and I live right across the steet from her so she doesn't even have to travel anywhere. I think it's fair, what do you all think?

I told Subway today that I wasn't willing to work any more than 3 days a week, so she told me that I'd be working on Tuesdays and Fridays def. and either Wed. or Thurs, one or the other each week. Sometimes a Sat. but I only put down days for saturdays. The way I see it is that they have mainly teenagers working there, she's getting someone thats damned near 30 and has experience so she can bemore lienient with me on my hours, and if she's not willing to then I'm sure I can find something somewhere else. I do believe though that this place pays cash... which is strange but I'm not complaining. =)

I'll try it... hopefully it works out and I don't miss my kiddo too much, but if it doesn't work it just doesn't work... I'll manage somehow.. lol

So Robyn has a job now. Blech... lol

a day at the kingdom

Took Mik to Kentucky Kingdom yesterday. She rode her first roller coaster ever, and we sat in the very first seat too. Hehe had to do it right. Of course, it was just a kiddy coaster but me and Sean liked it, it was pretty decent. She loved it! We had to go on it a couple times. hehe

Something that pissed us off though... she's too small to ride the bumper cars.. like it's ok to maybe toss her ass off a coaster but you can't run into her on the damned ground! sucked, she really wanted to ride em, she couldn't even ride if we went... bullshit!

But we had a blast there, spent most the day. Discovered that in Hurricane Bay, theres a section just for kids called Barefoot Cove.. it's pimpin.. it's got all kinds of small slides and chutes and shit.. she loved it, we'd have spent more time there if we hadn't got to it so late in the day, they close it at 7. But we'll go back for sure.

She got to be in the character parade too... got to walk with slyvester and tweety and granny and all the other costumed creatures...

We just had too much fun. =) One of these days when we go I'll take my camera.. just didn't feel like carrying it all day and trying to keep it dry.

Again......

Mom called me today. Said that Larry was up to his old shit again.. Talking shit about me and just being bitchy in general like he does so well. She told me that she made a mistake by going back (again), that she didn't love him anymore like she thought she did and that L.C. said she could come back (yep again) so tomorrow Terrys gonna help Sean and we're gonna move her to L.C.s (again) BUT, I told her this was the absolute LAST time we were moving her, and we were taking every single bit of her shit this time down to L.C's and thats that. She'll just have to make the most of living with him cuz this shit is getting old.

Confused much? You bet.

On a better note, Andy informed me yesterday that he's shopping around for plane tickets and hes coming in for Mik's birthday! I'm so excited! I miss him soo much, so does Mik and Sean. It'll be so awesome to see him again. Hopefully I won't have to work too much while he's here.

Better run though, keeping an eye on B for Terry today and the two princess' are playing golf on the porch.. so I better go watch em. =)

This is the funniest picture I've ever taken. Na-Nook, the puppy was trying to bite my camera when I was trying to get a close up of him, and I ended up taking a picture of the inside of his mouth... LMAO 

Na Nook was running around with Brian today.. it was so hard to catch him still enough to get a good pic but this one is the best I got 

Rotten kid climbing on Grandmas fence.. It's so cool to watch your own kid doing the things you remember doing when you were a kid 

Grandmas Flowers... she works so hard on them every year. 

Grandmas Flowers.. they look so awesome this year 

I just thought this one was cute.. hehe Reminds me of those "Dog" pictures where the dog has great big eyes.. heh 

Bad news.

I finally got to go pick up Boots from the vet. But she came with bad news. Boots has cystitis.
=( All the cat lovers out there prolly know what this is already. It's a Urinary Tract / Kidney disease. It causes crystals to form in their pee and the urge to pee is very strong, hence why they just pee wherever it hits em at. I had a cat named K.C. that had this and we had to put her to sleep because of it.

They sent me home with some antibiotics for her for 12 days and I had to buy 30 dollar food for her. It's a medicated food and a pain in my ass. I've always just filled the bowl and left it out all day for both my cats. Well Zoe can't have bootsies food cause it's medicated and Bootsie can't have Zoes food because the ph in it can send her "over the edge" as the vet put it. Bootsie has to lose weight and can never eat anything but this special food ever again, no other cat food, no treats, no peole food and I'm guilty of spoiling my babies with all three of those.

I'm going to feel like an asshole when I give Zoe table food and treats but not Boots. And this whole seperating the cats at food time is really hard to do. Zoe's pissed cause her food bowl isn't on the floor where it usually is and she keeps hissing at Boots cuz she "smells funny". I guess the hissing will pass in a day or two. When Zoe was spayed, Boots hissed at her for a day or two when she finally came home. Crazy how two cats can totally love each other normally, but let them smell different and it's screw you buddy.

I went on and bought some of the food and I'm going to try this and see if I can make it work first. Out of my two kitty's, Bootsie's my favorite. She's the sweetest most loveable, talkative cat I've ever had and she loves me like nothing else. She even comes to me when I call her name. I sooooooo don't want to have to put her to sleep, but I'm not sure I've got much choice about it.

This isn't something that'll ever go away, some cats are just prone to it. She's always going to have to be on this food and I'll alawys have to keep the food seperate from the two. *sigh*

So now I get to add my Bootsie to the list of things I love that are going to die soon. =( Woe is me for sure!

Oh Beautiful..........

Didn't really do anything too awful exciting for the 4th.... so I just decided to paint in a flag to show my patriotism. =) Yay America! Hope everyones was great. Happy HNT! Hop on over to "The Other HNT" (button on my sidebar) and view the best sides of everyone. hehe.

My Bootsie

They made me leave my baby for the night. =(

Took my Bootsie Kitty to the vet today to see why she's been pissing on my floor, and they couldn't get a urine sample for her so they reccomended I leave her there overnight so they could collect a sample later on. So I did. But I hate it. Bootsie is my nighttime kitty, she's the one who cuddles with me all night and demands love until I fall asleep.... won't be any of that tonight.

Yes I know, she's just a cat but she's my baby. I'm just worried that she thinks I abandoned her. She's been abandoned before, we adopted her from the Humane Society so I don't want her being like.. hey this feels like Deja Vu or anything.

Miss my titten. I've already called and checked on her twice.. lol and she's only been there 3 hours so far.

Either she has a urinary tract infection or it's a behavioral problem.. Hopefully it's not the latter... a UTI is much easier to fix. BUT, either way I'll do my best to get her back to normal. My grandmas first words were You might have to put her down... Ummmm... nope. She's barely 4 years old, she's the most loveable cat I've ever had... she's my favorite out of all my cats I've had.. I refuse to put her to sleep for this. I stay home during the day, I have time to work with her and retrain her if need be..... it'll work out.. I just want to get her back home.

Ya'll prolly think I'm Nukkin Futz huh? lol

On your marks... get set..... RUN.

Maybe I shouldn't take things so personally all the time.

Mom got a letter yesterday from Social Security telling her she had received an overpayment of like 5 grand back in 98. Yea 98... Lat time I checked, it was 06... way to be SS..... notice something that happened damned near 10 years ago. So anyway, to pay back this overpayment they are keeping every penny mom draws until Feb. of 07. So that apartment she was so excited to get just got washed right down the drain. She can apply for SSI, but it's about 300 less per month than she's always drawn, and she can't afford all her bills in a apt. with just SSI. Breaks my heart. Let's not make anything easy on her.

So, she's been staying with L.C.... L.C. said, stay here as my room mate, and come and go as you please. She was fine with this until today. Larry called and invited her down for dinner. L.C. spazzed out. WTF? And naturally, when anyone gets mad at mom, they immediatly start talking shit abou tme. again... WTF? I bend my ass over backwards to help all these fucking assholes anytime, or almost anytime they ask. I mean sure, sometimes I just can't drop everything and take someone to the store but thats to be expected... I'm not at their beck and call. It's a mother fucking favor assholes... if I can't at the moment it's not because I'm being hateful, t's because I'm already busy.... ugh. He had to pay some bills online and Joe couldn't help him so mom told him that I'd probably help him do it and he responded with "Robyn hardly ever does anything for me when I ask her" Fuck that... he'll see now how much Robyn does for him won't he? I can't even think of a time I've turned him down when he's asked. Not one time. Cept for two days ago when he asked me to pick him up from work.. I couldn't... my car is dead.. Now how the fuck am I supposed to help that? The fucking car is dead.. it's not like he asked me and then I went out and like slashed the tires and poured water in the gas tank or anything just so I wouldn't have to come get him.. it fucking died on it's own accord. Assholes.

So she's thinking about going back down to Larrys... I told her that what she's doing is wrong.. you can't just up and leave everytime someone gets mad at you. You can' tplay games with people, but thats her life, not mine. I told her I'd be civil to Larry but that he wouldn't be allowed around Mik by himself ever, regardless ofhow nice he pretended to be to her. He crossed aline with disciplining her and once it's been crossed, theres no uncrossing it. Sorry. That may seem stubborn but I'm her mom. It's my job to protect her no matter who it pisses off. Sean, on the other hand,isn't even willing to be civil. He wants nothing to do with Larry. And in a way I understand. Larry threatned Sean, not that Seans scared or anything like that, but if he's going to get mad enough to threaten us, what's he going to do to Mik next time she doesn't listen to him ya know... so I can see Seans point. I do think that for my moms sake, he could be un hateful when Larry's around but he isn't willing to do that. He says that if Larry's there, he's taking Mik and leaving regardless of the circumstance. *sigh*

I sometimes feel like just running away from everything. I'm so serious too. If I didn't have my family (sean and mik) I'd prolly have left by now. I've never encountered something that I couldn't pull myself through but all the heartache that I know moms feeling is killing me. I don't know how to make things better for her or me.

I wish that I could just say let's me and you get aplace together, or I'll pay some of your bills for you, but I can't do either of those things.. hell half the time I can't even pay all my own bills.

Because of this stress I'm always so short with Mik too. I lose my patience with her at the drop of ahat and I hate that. I wish I could deal with everything better. It's not Mik's fault and I know that. I'm not being a very good mommy and the greatest thing about it.... No one will help me. There are a ton of people that could come get her for a few hours or keep her overnight just to give me some time to myself but that never happens. And I guess it's wrong of me to want some time to myself. I should want to spend every second with my daughter, and it's not necisarrily that I don't want her with me, I just want a little bit of time to go for a walk by myself, or take a nap or something. Like I said, I'm being a terrible mommy.

I'm so sorry to anyone I've offended lately, or whatever. I'm so sorry to my daughter for not having patience with her, I'm sorry to my husband for whatever I've done to him lately. I think I'm losing it.

***UPDATE***

I was going to make a seperate post about this but I was worried that no one would read this one if I did that and this is th one that explains everything.. lol

K, well I went to pick Mom up from Larrys last night and take her back to L.C's for the night. She proceeds to tell me that Pappy (her friend who's coming in town in the next couple weeks) is an ordained minister and is going to marry her and Larry when he's here. Ummm...... WTF? Let's just go from living together, to hating each other, to talking shit, to having dinner together, to let's get married. Again, I'm so confused.

Now, it's not going to be an official marriage, no paperwork or anything legal because she'd lose her medication help and he'd lose his section 8 and it's not worth that to either of them so it's just a ceremony. Yea Yea it's sweet I guess, but I think it's retarded personally. I mean two days ago they couldn't stand each other, they have one steak dinner and now they're getting married. See why I want to run away?

Rotten babies

Have to take my Bootsie Baby to the vet. She's been peeing on my carpet lately. I guess maybe she has a urinary tract infection or something like that. Hopefully it's nothing major and we can get her to stop.

Sean and I have always wondered why someone would have given Boots up. She's such a sweet cat and she's very loveable and doesn't have a mean bone in her so maybe she has an unhealthy bladder or soemthing reaccuring cause I've seen her not use her litter box before this, I just figured the box wasn't clean enough for her or something. But we cleaned it and everything and she's still using the floor. She'll shit in her box, but pees in the floor. Lol I'd handle it better if it was the other way around.

So I've told you how goofy Zoe is and how she damned near will eat anything you give her. I've caught her eating brocolli, corn, carrots, just anything she can find cuz she's a big fat weirdo lol. But last night Sean was rolling a joint and Zoe started eating the bud.. lol We got it from her before she ate enough to matter but I still thought it was funny. I've never been a person who get's their animals high either. I'm actually the one that'll bitch slap you if you try it. Can't fuck with an animal like that, brains are just too small. But when said animal turns itself into an addict, what can you do? lol She'll sit right in front of you and when you exhale she'll jump into the cloud just to "get her a hit" lol, so we've started locking her in the bedroom when we smoke... silly cat.

Anyway, the pics above are...........

1. Zoe being a Meerkat, standing up on her hind legs.. lol

2. Lazy rotten Bootsie

3. This was Zoe when we first brought her home, all tiny and adorable. She's damned near 15 pounds now lol. Fatass!

4. My babies love each other.

5. Lazy rotten hairball Zoe hehe.