i think the gorge is cursed.... lol

First off.. I have no camera so I have no pics to post..... but we went campin this weekend... Took Mikayla to Red River Gorge for the first time ever.... Bernie and Belynda went with us for a night too. The camping trip was awesome... couldn't have been better..ik had a blast, bernie and belynda had fun and me and sean had a great time.... got to take them alla round and show em the sights and whatnot.... didn't hike much cuz of Mik being with us but we still took them all to see alot. =)

Well, Bernie and Belynda left early sunday afternoon cuz Belynda has to work sunday nights..... and we were gonna stay one more night.... well heard on the radio that heavy storms with terrential rain was headed that way..... and we've been thru that before and didn't wanna take that risk with Mikayla with us so about 10 at night Sean and I decided that the lightning was becoming a little too intimidating and to be safe we should go ahead and get out of there..... so we pack up and wake the kid.. tear everything down and leave....

Get about 5 minutes into the gorge.... with no cell phone receptioon AT ALL and very heavy storms headed our way... and the car starts squaking and jumping and making all kinds of fucking noise....... so we made the decision to keep driving it.... we needed to get to reception in case it died or we would have just been stranded and totally screwed.... well, get it onto the expressway and it stops making noise.... so we just head home.... well right around 140 miles from Louisville the squaking comes back it shoots up to like 6rpms and then dies........ dead...... I have just enough cell reception to text... it wouldn't let me make or receive calls but I could text// and luckily my cousins husband waS still awake.... him and his friend Jeff drove out to the exp[ressway to find andrescue us.... we stayed the night at their house but the cars still sitting side of the eway.... I have no way to tow the damn thing and his friend Jeff said his opinion is that it either dropped a valve or threw a rod. either way it's fucked.... lol

I think Seans mom is going to come pick us up and take us to our car to get the stuff out of it but Idk whats gonna happen with the car. I guess I'll let Shnnon and Adam see if they can somehow get it toqwed to their house and go from there... beats me.



so yeah that my weekend story... lol I'm glad we left though.. regardless of the breaking down middle of the night shit cause the storms did hit and parts of the gorge is all fucked up again so had we stayed we'd have been stranded there instead with no reception (and by this point my cell battery is dead anyway) and no car.... so at least we're safe here at Shannon's. =) I'm so thankful they were there last night.


AND oh yeah..... I quit my job. =) I decided to do that yesterday though... haD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE CAR OR BEING STUCK OR WHAtever...... i just am miserable there anymore and hate it..... can't be that unhappy just because of one little fuzzy asshole ya know... I let someone I work with decide my mood in life and thats not right... he's SOOOOOOOOO not worth that. AT ALL. lol

If I would have called into work this morning telling Matt my car died and I was stuck he'da never believed me and would have fired me anyway... lol so regardless.. I made the right choice all around. =)

still bitching hehe

Pretty sure I'm quitting my job today.. I have all my uniforms bagged up in case. Our owner called a staff meeting and told me yesterday that after he finished no one might wanna work there.... but I can tell him before he even begins that I don't want to anymore.

In a way I feel bad... see Joe threatened me the other day... and when I told Sean about it, he told another friend of ours and they both want nothing more than to give him the smack he thought about giving me... but I've stopped them both because violence isn't going to help anything.

I looked up my rights as an employee tho and there are laws protecting me from my *manager* threatening me and the time he called me a cunt. I could take him to court and he'd lose his job and have some community service to do... but I'm not gonna do that either.. I don't want him to lose his job..... god knows he'll never be able to find another one to match it.

It's funny cause he's got this superiority complex about him like he's so special and just so good at his job and this gives him this ridecoulous ego. We make sandwiches... if you're not *good* at that, then you're obviously just a reject. I mean for real... how hard is it? lol It's almost funny how proud he is of it..... but they pay him an absurd amount of money... like 13 or more an hour.. he's worked there for 10 years...... he will not be able to go anywhere with that experience and get anything more than a minimum wage job.... they will laugh him out of the interview if he tries to claim managerial experience... takes a little more than calling in a produce order to be amanager.

I think the main problem between him and I is that I know his job is crap.... and I know my job is crap... but I accept it.. lol he still thinks he's got something good goin. and I don't let him bos me around. I accept that he's my manager but at the same time I don't ever need help so he doesn't do anything for me y a know..

ugh.. I'll stop about work... it just aggravates me... I almost can't wait to quit.. lol fuck that stupid dead end place... enjoy your life as a sandwich maker you grumpy little troll... lol


Grandma is doing alright... she's still really sore but she can get up and walk around and whatnot.. I got her walker out for her so she has it to help support herself with.

Started cleaning the basement today.. got it emptied and started sweeping... then took an internet break lol... gotta finish sweeping then go get my paycheck... then I'ma come back and mop I guess.... it's pretty dusty and dirty down there.. It's not too bad though....

I think I'm gonna go tonight and buy mik a new matress and us a bed also.... we both need em... still need some more furnitire too tho.... got bare minimum what we need.. lol

Well, gonna run i guess.. go get my paycheck and back to cleaning this dusty ass basement.. lol

Long as our neighbors don't catch on I'll have internet access... lol

i just need to bitch... and update... lol

Quite a bit to talk about so I'm going to try to be brief about everything so I don't forget anything or make this reaaaally long. =) I'm on a laptop sitting outside at my grandmas house at like 10 at night. We are staying the night and brought the laptop hoping someone would have an unsecure network...hehe....and they did..and here I am.

k, first and foremost... Creeds surgery went great. Perfect even.. it started a little late, the donors family wanted their whole family to be able to view them before they released them to be donated to Creed. But around 3am they started... said expect about 9 hours and it only took about 7. He did great all the way thru it, and although he is still in the icu...mainly as procedure and precaution....he is off both the ventilators, and breathing 100% on his own. They've even removed the chest tubes.

I haven't made it to actually see him since because my work schedule and the icu visitation schedules clash but I'm off all weekend so I'm definitly going to see him then. =) I am so happy.... and relieved..... it's just an amazing, unbelievable thing to me that seemed like it would never get here...and now it's here. and finished... and he's healthy.. and ah, it overwhelms me. I love Creed. he's a dear dear friend to me, I just couldn't be any happier for him. I'[ll still post updates as I time goes on though for those that have been following all along. =) And thank you for all your good wishes and thoughts and prayers and whatnot.;... it obviously did its job.

K, second.... my friends dad passed away from cancer.. he'd been sick for years from it but just kept fighting.. just like my momma.. but it finally got the best of him. Went to his funeral.... they always upset me... I could go to a persons I don't even know and get upset about it.. lol it's just the environment I guess...... and the memories. ugh.
Anyway, my thoughts have been on her for the past few weeks... she's tough like me so I know she's alright but I also know it hurts regardless how tough you are... and I want her to know I luvs her. =)

3rd.. my job... it's still driving me nuts... it's not even so much my job, it's my manager. He just really dislikes me now. He tried to play it off talking to other people saying I just don't understand what happened.. we used to be so cool....... and yep we did.. but thats before he fell into some unhappy hole andstarted treating everyone around him like shit. And I've never had issue one with him outside of work.. we've hung out many many time outside work and always had fun.. and to this day I'll invite him to things I'm going to (but he'll never come)..... no, my issue is not him as a friend, pr normal person.... my issue is with him as some sort of authority figure over me..

And I can even handle that he's my manager... I did it for years.. he's always beenn the manager and I've always respected that about him... but when he started fucking around with chrissy he turned intoo a totally different person and just because an asshole. Even our boss when he interviews new hires, he tells them that I'm talkative but that Joe can be pretty hard to get along with. To me that just doesn't make sense.. why would you want someone who can't even reason with other people, no he has to autonatically start an argument or try to make someone feel stupid or small. He did it to the new girl just yesterday.. I'll tell that part of the story in a second... let me finish my point here first.... lol my point is that as an owner, matt shouldn't allow joe to be that way toward other employees that he is supposed to be a role model for. BUT HE DOES. lol

so that story.....

Yesterday

Had a pretty heavy lunch rush, we usually do.. and it was me Joe and the new girl working. Matt wanted new girl on the register for practice while we were busy.. so I assumed I was going to take the slicer and joe the middle because we try to alternate, but with having new people thats hard to really do cuz neither of them can do the slicer yet so it's me and joe only who does it til they have time to learn it better first, and Joe did it like 4 or 5 days of last week... and yeah it can wear you out.... it hurts my wrist like crazzy... well, he slices the first couple peoples sandwiches and passes them down before I get my hands dried and ready to work... so I dress them.... whatever.... then he slices the next couple people and I dress them..... well he makes this comment that matt actually hears that time that "I'm not on that damned thing again, I had it like 4 times last week". Which whatever spazzy... we all realized that anyway and I'd already planned to take it for the next couple days actually so u (manager) could help newbies with the register.... see this had all been figured out...lol he just likes to bitch because he thinks the attention itbrings himself makes him look special. which it doesn't... it just makes people like matt (our boss) do things like..... warn new employees about him. Well.... seeing as how we were really busy... and she had a million questions for him.. when I would get done slicing the line of people i had, I would move down and dress a couple so Joe had time to help her.... and I guess this next incident just broke that poor camels back for lil Joe that day..... but the beeper beeped.... We have a grill that has a timer that beeps when it's 18 seconds is over so we dont forget about the sandwiches on it... (lol) well, I went over to get it off th grill (which is technically a middle persons job).... I cut the sandwich in half.. which is standard procedure for our store and put it on their tray.... then.... here it comes ya'll... you ready??? I got a napkin and wiped off the knife that resides in Joes area..... (it had sauce on it from where I cut the other sandwich).... But yep.. I guess that did it for him... and that' sliterally all I done too cause after i helped with that one, I walked away and stocked my chips and wiped my slicer a lil. (I'll explain that later too) nah fuck it, I'll explain it now.. it goes along sorta..... part of the slicer persons job is to stock chips and clean the slicer off..... well my chips stayed stocked all day,they always do when it's my job... I'm VERY good at my job... easy at it is... many people aren't that good at it.. but I really am.... anyway... I figured the slicer wasn't really as pressing as some of the other things that needed to be done since we were that busy... so I helped the new girl out a little... cleaned a few tables and trays for her... she's new.. we were slammed.. it can be overwhelming.. and Joe said to me over and over and over again... (like he's my god damned mother) "she'll never learn if you keep doing it for her robyn" which yeh you're right she won't but it's not like I'm like.. ok girl you go sit down.. i'ma do all your shit then you can come back.... no.. I was wiping a fucking table..... find something REAL to bitch about dude... jesus god damned christ....

But anyway... the whole reason behind this rambling is because new girl came up to me after our lunch rush was gone and said "I see what everyone has been talking about now" (there have been like 8 people who have worked at our store before come in since she started and basically tell her to run far far away because none of them could stand working for his my shit don't stink ass) but anyway.. I said "Why, he piss you off already?" and she said "Well yeah, he kept getting all kinds of frustrated with me about my questions and then when he told you that I'd never learn if I didn't do it myself, he kept coming over himself and just pushing the buttons instead of letting me do it... I hate a hypocrit.. I get what Matt meant" BUT THEN SHE SAID "and apparantly he really isn't too fond of you neither" and I kinda laughed and said "nah he's not, but why do you say that?" and she (blew me away) but she said "cause he said if you cleaned one more knife on his area or did anything else that was technically his job he was going to smack you in front of everyone on this line" and my jaw just dropped....... OF COURSE he said it to her instead of me first off cause OMG... Omg omgomg he'd have lost at least 3 teeth right thenand there. She also told me that he opened up to her the other night at work and told her that he had no idea why him and I weren't cool anymore and that he tried just sooo hard to be a good guy and he believes that he'll be treated only how he treats others so he tries to be nice to everyone...... and grr it ate me alive.... luckily she's not a re and didn't buy a word of it... but still....thats how he's made it this far without just getting his ass beat is because he knows how to talk to the right people.

But I do too. ;)

And all of you are thinking.l.. why not just tell your boss? I have... I did.. yesterday actually and the response I got was.... Oh he came in like that today.. it's just a "joe" day deal with it til 3 and he leaves....

I think thats crap... I'm too old to just beat him up and I have bills to pay so i can't just quit my job and I work for a mom and pop business so I have 0 rights.....

I don't want to get him fired... he says all the time "oh your just after my job"

well a. your jobs a joke.... just like mine is. you manage what 3 people... 2 are a week old... and th other is your equal as far as the job goes.... your only managerial duty is to call in a 45 second produce order.... "yeah hi, this is bob from bobs and I need a case of lettuce, 2 cases of tomatoes and some green peppers today... yeah thanx." man.. be so proud..... demand that respect.

but b. I wish you nothing but the best..... I didn't mind working under you before.... so all you have to do it stop being adick and I'll like my job again... otherwise.. I'm either quitting.... or.. um yeah. ;)


mwhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

and c. I'm going back to school... I'm only going to work part time.... I don't want to be a manager.... specially of asub shop... been there. done that... cept I was in an office all day doing paperwork and schedules and payroll and inventory .. you know.. manager things... also managed a very sucessful, thats still around halloween store for a season.. they even fired the night manager because I did such a good job they wanted only me as the manager... um, I've been a book keeper (kinda like an accountant but with less clients and no degree), an asisstant manager more times than I can count... and the sole employee that ran the entire box office system at the drive in.... I undersand what true responsibility is.. I've had many areal job.. right now I have a cake cake cake job... I can't believe people over 25 actually work there as long as I have but I have reasons lol..... but still... point is.... I'm moving on... even if I got fired tomorrow I'm still going to be fine. a part time job with my experience is not hard to find...

I enjoy my job... I do like working there and the owner is amazing... he's the best man i've ever met in my life... he has a heart of gold and trys to provide opportunitys for people to better themselves. I respect him ore than any man i've ever met.. i really do. he's helped me with some impossible tasks.... I've survived because of him..... and my job is easy like i sad, and I'm extremly good at it. both the new people have told me they want me to train them instead because I work more effenciently. But then i start trying to teach them somthing and I get accused of *trying to steal someones job* I'm so stuck.... murder is illegal...

My grandma offered to let me move back in with her.... I don't exactly want to because it's the basement AGAIN... and I've spent so much of my life in that basement but it's a good idea at the same time.... pros: I'm right here with grandma when she needs me.. instead of her having to find me and hope I'm near..... Mik is super comfortable in this house......mik also has friends right down the court and a sidewalk to play on.. and anot too busy court............ it saves me a ton in rent and expenses that i can put toward filing bankruptcy and going to school.... I can afford going to part time so that school isn't so rough and I have more time to devote to it and my family..
Cons: Mik also has friends at the apt and it's a perfect perfect playing outside arrangement...I'm ina lease and the only way out is to be evicted which goes on my credit...... it's the basement again lol...... she's not crazy about my cats (although she said I could have them).....

I guess thats enough for now... i've left my husband unattended long enough and I have LOTS of clothes to wash and it's after 11 already....

wait.. did I tell you about grandma? The whole reason I'm over here right now lol....

She had a Ventral hernia... part of her bowels had pushed thru her stomach and she had surgery today to have it pushed back in and that weak spot sealed off somehow... idk exactly... but she's doing well.. sore as expected. They kept her overnight just for observation so I stayed over here with my uncle cause he gets uncomfortable when he's alone. and that's how I jacked one of her neighbors internet... hehe

good night.

Creed is getting his lungs!!!!!!!

I have no internet still but I had access for a second and wanted to make sure and post this. My Friend Creed, the one we did the Give A Buddy A Lung benefits for years back is at the hospital right now being prepped. They called him this morning, said his lungs are ready. They found a match!!!!! It's a double lung transplant and is going to take every bit of 10 hours but they are giving him a 90% survival rate on surviving just the surgery. There is no way to determine how his body will react and wether he will reject them or not but the drugs they have available now are amazing at helping your body to adjust and be stable.

I'm so excited... and so nervous at the same time... I can't believe it's finally here.. I'm so happy for him. Hopefully I get to keep my childhood friend for many more years to come. So everyone please keep him in your thoughts and send nothing but goodness this way. =)

Hopefully I still have mo job tomorrow too..... I've been telling my boss for months and months and months that this was coming up and he made it perfectly clear to me that he understoood the situation and would support me and let me off whatever day that it happens..... so I went in to work today to tell him it's finally here and he looks at me and says "you need to decide to yourself which is more important to you" hmm.....making sandwiches at a dead end teenager stupid job.... or being there for the line in life when it's decided if my friend lives or dies...... yeah I think I chose door number 2. My boss is only mad because we are short handed. Our 3rd employee quit 4 weeks ago and he hired a replacement but she has already quit too so we have 2 employees plus our boss..... Now when our boss lea ves for a 2 hour delivery and leaves just Joe and I to fend for ourselves in an 800$ lunch rush... thats perfectly acceptable.... but when I need the day off to support my friend and celebrate the fact he made it, or mourn the fact that he didn't and I have to leave work to just Joe and our boss... thats unacceptable......... wtf ever. If my fiend doesn't make it, and I call in... and I get fired.... I will get unemployment. He has denied it for most every employee he has every fired but he's never quite had an employee like me. I have info that the irs would shut him down for.. and I had approval for this day off for at least 7 months now... deny me..... and I'll bare all your laundry.

But in reality, I'll go to work I'm sure... because it's my job and I'm responsible... but one word will not be spoken from me to anyone in that building. not one word, and I couldn't mean that any more literal than that. I will go to work, do my work, and leave... then straight back to th hospital I come.

But enough about me and my riduculous job..... also... I wrote a letter to my boss... 14 pages back and front explaining every single thing that goes on behind his back by everyone that has every worked there, myself included.. I told him about everything that gets said when he's not there, and about how I felt...... and guess what it got me..... a dollar raise. Yeah... guess he agreed with me. He knows that cetain (aspects) to that place are as crooked, phony, bitchy and problematic as anything he's ever encountered. His response to me told me that he totally agreed with me and that he appreciates my hard work........

But, this situation is bullshit I think. Not that what I think matters but it's bullshit.. He knows it's bullshit too. And I bet Joe is just eating it up that they wouldn't let me off..... but thats another thing too.... I've got like 5 people who have approached me about joes attitude with everyone lately and told me that all I have to do is say one word and it's fixed..... but I'm not like that. I'd never hurt anyone... or get anyone hurt... and regardless of what mr. high horse joe thinks, I'm not wanting him to lose his job. I know he needs his job just as much as I do but the attitude with me WILL stop soon. and his thinking hes better than me WILL stop soon too. I care how many more years you have on me.. it's a sandwich shop... one year of employeement is equal to 45 years of employment as far as experience goes... 12 years doesn't make you any better... why? because it's not fucking possible to get any bhetter.. you cut meat, spread may on sandwiches and answer a phone every now and then....... get over yourself... lol how funny right?

I miss blogging..... But. moral of my story wasn't to rant about my work..... it was to make you think about Creed. send every good thought you have this way.. he's going to need them.... and thanks to everyone who's helped out thru the years with our fundraising for him. =)